I need a girlfriend so bad jobs
I'm looking for a talented individual who can help me develop an LLM text model which behaves like a virtual girlfriend. This text model must be engaging in intelligent dialogues with emotions and feelings. Here are the primary requirements for this project: - Create an AI-driven text model: I need a text model that is capable of engaging in intelligent dialogues. This means understanding context, providing relevant and meaningful responses, and exhibiting emotional intelligence. - Incorporate emotional responses: The text model should be capable of expressing emotions and feelings in a realistic manner. This is crucial for creating a believable and engaging virtual girlfriend. - The model can be trained from scratch or, ...
...Eastern Europe. ✻ NO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED ✻ You do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable; rather, I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first logic test you complete for me will be an unpaid logic test. In o...
I am looking for a unique and eye-catching logo for my roller skating group, the "Bad Boys Skate Crew", as we are gearing up to celebrate our 5th year anniversary under the theme "B5". Your design will be pivotal in helping us commemorate this milestone in a special way, so we're looking for something truly special. Key requirements for the logo: - Design Style: I'm seeking a blend of urban flair and cleanliness. The logo should have a bold and eye-catching appeal, reflecting our group's dynamic spirit. - Branding: Options for branding could include the following words - B5, Bad Boys Skate Crew, Bad Boys, 5th Year Anniversary, BBSC - Color Scheme: The logo should primarily feature the colors...
...work style with a focus on quality and meeting deadlines. What We Offer: An exciting project with the opportunity to develop innovative solutions for leading e-commerce platforms. Flexible working hours and the possibility to work remotely. Support and collaboration with a professional and experienced team. Fair Prices for the Projects. Application: If you meet the requirements and are interested in this exciting opportunity, please send your complete application, best case including your resume, portfolio, and references, to info(at)keyone.me. We look forward to hearing from you! Even if you just have experience with one of the named plattforms, we would still be very happy about your application. Contact: Julian Pfeiffer KeyOne Schaberweg 28a,...
...do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable. I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first logic test you complete for me will be an unpaid logic test. In other words, I would not pay you any money whatsoe...
I'm seeking a reliable, friendly companion to keep me company on a daily basis while my husband is away on a work trip from July 18th 2024 - July 26th 2024. The arrangement is for 24-hour hangout sessions. Key Tasks: - Help me care for my animals (I have 8 cats, 2 dogs and a ferret) such as: feeding, walking, cleaning litter boxes. - Engage in home-based activities: I allow smoking in my garage and I have an Xbox and a PS5. Listening ti music and watching anime is a plus! - I currently do not have a license so helping me run errands would also be appreciated. - Be present and supportive: While this is not a traditional job, I value good company and would appreciate someone who can be ...
...werden. Bitte planen Sie genügend Platz für einen Schreibtisch, Regale und Stauraum ein. Lage: Ideal wäre eine ruhige Ecke, abseits der Hauptwohnfläche. Gästezimmer: Fläche: ca. 14 Quadratmeter Zweck: Soll als Gästezimmer genutzt werden. Bitte planen Sie Platz für ein Bett, einen Kleiderschrank und möglicherweise einen kleinen Schreibtisch ein. Lage: Bevorzugt in der Nähe des Badezimmers. Dusche/Bad: Fläche: ca. 12 Quadratmeter Ausstattung: Dusche, Waschbecken, Toilette. Lage: Zentral und gut zugänglich für Gäste und Bewohner. Abstellraum: Lage: Direkt hinter der Küche für einfache Zugänglichkeit. Zweck: Für Haushaltsgeräte, Reinigungsmittel und Lagerung von Vorräten. WC: Lage:...
...into a frequency/bpm output. This project is intended for a research project I am undertaking. I am looking to see if FFT/Wavelets are able to produce acurate bpm readings so there is not definitive method to follow which is why I require your help/ Key requirements include: - Utilizing Fast Fourier Transformation and/or Wavelet Analysis to transform the raw temperature data. (Data is in the form of multiple .csv files with temperature readings and time stamps). Ideal skills for this project include: - Proficiency in Fast Fourier Transformation and Wavelet Analysis. - Strong command of R programming language for generating the output in R code. Maximum budget for this project is $100 USD. Required turn around will be approximately one week ...
Initial discussion about troubleshooting issue
I am looking for an expert in web scraping who can efficiently extract business leads. While the primary purpose of the project was not specified, it is undeniable that these leads will play a pivotal role in marketing efforts, like sales lead generation, market research, and contact information collection. Although I did not mention a specific source site, note that the target is business owners, and their revenue and contact information. Therefore, having experience in scraping from professional networking and business directory websites such as LinkedIn or Yellow Pages would be welcomed. Lastly, the exact number of leads that I need hasn't been defined, so I am open to both small and large-scale operations. Ultimately, thei...
...do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable. I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first logic test you complete for me will be an unpaid logic test. In other words, I would not pay you any money whatsoe...
I'm in search of a seasoned content writer who can adeptly craft long, professional blog posts, website content, social media captions and other marketing content. The right candidate will have a strong command of the English language, an ability to produce engaging and creative content, and the capacity to adapt their writing style based on the platform. About Us: Stanley Engineered Fastening, a part of Stanley Black and Decker is a leading manufacturer of industrial metal and plastic fasteners and fastener assembly systems, catering to a wide range of manufacturing industries. Primarily we cater to industries such as automotive, electric vehicles, aerospace, renewable energy, and general manufacturing. We are seeking talented freelance content wr...
Velocity alert analysis and provide actionable insights. Key requirements include: - Proficient in analyzing velocity alerts using SQL or SPL or Python - Capable of translating data from a word file into actionable insights - Experienced in the field of identity analytics, risk engine, authentication channel for the digital banking platforms - Understanding of Account Takeover (ATO) or digital identity compromise - Leverage known data as it relates to the digital customer identity and risk decisioning. - Analyze data logs from customer authentication channels and digital banking applications for malicious use and bad actors. - Create long-term solutions and automation to processes that can be improved when digital member identity is being utilized. Refer to attached documen...
I need a professional who can help me prove that a signature on a business check is not mine. This is important as I'm being charged with passing a bad check and believe my signature was forged. Key Requirements: - Authenticate Signature: The primary objective is to prove the signature on the check is not mine. This involves comparing the signature on the check with my genuine ones. - Legal Context: Experience or understanding of fraud investigations and court procedures would be beneficial as this is related to a legal charge. Your Approach: - Signature Analysis: I would need you to compare the signature on the check with my genuine signatures to provide me with definitive proof that it's not mine. - Documen...
I'm looking for skilled SEO specialists to help recover my blog's lost traffic due to Google updates. My site suffered because ...was hit hard by Google Spam Core updates. Consequently, my traffic dipped noticeably - 60% precisely. Tasks: 1. Assess & eradicate Low-quality backlinks: With well over 500 backlinks to my site, it is paramount to sift out those of low quality. 2. Enhance all components of SEO: I wish to focus on improving On-site content, Blog posts, and Technical SEO. 3. Boost rankings: The overall goal is to gain back, and even exceed our previous Google Ranks. Ideal Candidate: Should have a proven track record of cleaning up bad backlinks, adept at creating SEO-driven content, and boosting ranks after Google updates. Knowledge of Google A...
I'm in need of an illustrator to finalize 5 static cartoon images for an audio children's story that will be posted on YouTube. - **Illustration Style:** The style I'm aiming for is cartoon. - **Animation:** These illustrations are intended to be static, so I'm not looking for animations. I provide the basic illustrations/scenery. Ideal applicants for this job should have experience with creating engaging and child-friendly illustrations. Working in Adobe Illustrator + able to unify composite illustrations + adapt and finalize the character designs to my artistic direction (for exemple the bad guy must be a Nazi soldier in two illustrations).
We're looking to shift our main mail sender and SMTP from GoDaddy to SendGrid. The integration should be seamless, ensuring that all emails sent from our app are routed through SendGrid's API or SMTP. Key Requirements: - The transition should be smooth, with no disruption to the email functionality. - The SMTP...Proficient in PHP, as our primary programming language for the web application is PHP. - Prior experience with GoDaddy to SendGrid migration and SMTP integration would be advantageous. - Familiarity with SendGrid's API and SMTP services. - Strong communication skills and ability to follow instructions precisely. Please note that security and data integrity are of utmost importance. We're looking for a diligent professional who can handle this transitio...
Focus is on these two websites These are down and looking bad. We need someone to fix both rightnow for a milestone fee of 30 USD. Salvage the files by downloading Cleaning for malwares Uploading files for website to go live. We can also retain this same developer to manage them for a monthly fee.
I am keen to commission an engaging and well-researched argumentative essay on the dangers of nitrates and nitrites in food. This paper is intended to raise awareness and inform readers about the health risks associated with these compounds. Freelancers possessing a profound knowledge of health, food chemistry, or relevant field are invited to apply. Specific points to focus on would include: - The impacts of these compounds on the health of children - Potential links between nitrates/nitrites and cancer - Their effects on cardiovascular health It will be essential for potential freelancers to have excellent research skills, a knack for creating compelling arguments, and the capacity to write in a way that's comprehensible and engaging for a br...
I'm looking for a talented designer to create a logo for my comedy podcast. The theme of the podcast is primarily comedy, and the logo should reflect that. I would like something cartoonish, kinda like Distractible or Bad Friends like cartoonish but still kinda realism Key Requirements: - I envision the logo in pastel shades. - The design should be a combination of text and image. The text should be easy to read and the image should be related to comedy. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Graphic design with a strong portfolio of logo design work. - Understanding of comedy and how to visually represent it. - Proficiency in creating logos that work well in pastel shades and include both text and image. Please include samples o...
I'm in need of someone skillful in creating cartoonish style caricatures. The creation is for a gift featuring a depiction of my girlfriend and me. This must be: - Original and custom-made - Colorful and vibrant - Must capture our likeness in a fun, quirky, cartoonish style An individual with prior experience of creating cartoon caricatures is preferred. Be ready to showcase your portfolio or provide samples of your previous work that closely aligns with what I'm looking for. The end product must be high-resolution and suitable for printing, I want to make it a memorable gift. Please note the turnaround time in your proposal.
...2. file 3. 4. s2 folder with: (a) s2/s2 : All (8K) research papers in the corpus. Each research paper has 3 fields. i. docno: A unique document id for each research paper ii. title: Title of the research paper iii. paperAbstract: Abstract of the research paper A single paper entry looks like: { "docno": "6e4eddf4d6671c37537bb5d1c9623353b62e8531", "title": [ "Duality Theorems for Finite Structures ( Characterising Gaps and Good Characterisations)" ], "paperAbstract": [ "We provide a correspondence between the subjects of duality and density in classes of finite relational structures. ......" ] } 1 1 (b) s2/s2 : All the 100 queries. Each query has 2 fields: i. qid: The unique id of the ...
are down and looking bad. We need someone to fix both rightnow for a milestone fee of 30 USD.
We are a startup that is training AI algorithms for military use. We need a logo designed for business cards and our website. We want a cool, dangerous logo that reflects what we do - build weapons of war. Most defense companies like Boeing, Lockheed-Martin, General Dynamics, etc. have very boring, blue and white logos. Most tech companies have logos that look like something a 2-year-old would play with. As a defense-tech startup, we'd like a logo that gets away from the trend of blocky, minimalist tech logos and boring, unassuming defense company logos. We want a logo that says danger, intelligence, sophistication, and cool. As the person in charge of the logo, I've decided that I'd like a dark red on gunmetal...
Hi Daniel, I came across your profile and I have a project for you if interested. We're a translation company from Amsterdam, the Netherlands. Our client has pre-translated a file in Spanish, but not by a native speaker. We think they used AI but the quality isn't bad, probably because it contains mostly short sentences. We need this file to be proofread, but there's quite a lot of repetitions in the content, so use of a CAT will be important (from Spanish to Spanish ). We have the English file as well of course, so you can compare it to English, but using the CAT ES to ES will enable you to use translation memory so you can avoid having to check and change many repeating lines. It...
My primary concern with our current SEO blogs is rampant misspelling. This error predominantly appears within the body of the posts, which brings about a negative image for the company. I want all the blogs about our company created by the seo hire taken down. Her work has made us look so bad. At the time I didn't know of these things now we are finding they are all over Google first searches and just need taken down
You need to be at least 16 years old and reside in Latin America or Eastern Europe. ✻ NO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED ✻ You do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable. I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first l...
When I open the PDF, it doesn't show me the data on the second page. By changing the code (I provide pictures), it shows the data, but the graphics are bad. The project is small and simple. An opportunity for beginners. I pay max $5 and give a good review. Ideal opportunity for new freelancers.
Hi, I have my website that is an old domain. I used to be in the top five on local search before the COVID. Now I have almost no search traffic No alert from google in the search consol I have quiet some content on the website. The website is fast. Some time ago bad SEO guy did some bad links that I removed throught the search console Somebody has been doing some linking since 8 month and I'm still very low. I'm looking for someone who can tell me what could be fixed, or if I need to change domain name... Thanks
Hello! I need WordPress developer who can fix Core Web Vitals issues in Google Search Console and make my all URLS in good. I see most issues are related to INP, and LCP. My site is WooCommerce and experiencing issues related to lower speed as well. I want you to implement proper caching, image optimization, script optimization, reduce unnecessary plugins etc. I don't want you to use plugins but need manual work. Also We had some issue with polylang multidomain and fonts did't load in secondary domain. And getting stange 404 errors from time to time until we reset permalinks, I guess because of premmerce. I need serious WordPress developer who have coding knowledge of HTML, CSS, JS and PHP. Note: This job is not f...
I need a letter written to my ex-girlfriend addressing some unauthorized transactions, and demanding reimbursement. The letter should be firm in tone, clearly explaining the situation and the expectation for reimbursement. Key elements include: - A clear and concise explanation of the unauthorized transactions. - A firmly-worded demand for reimbursement. - Professional language and tone throughout. Ideal skills for this job include: - Strong writing skills, particularly in the realm of demand letters or similar formal communication. - Ability to draft professional and persuasive correspondence. - Understanding of legal or financial terminology, particularly in relation to unauthorized transactions. Please provide samples of similar work if poss...
You need to be at least 16 years old and reside in Latin America or Eastern Europe. ✻ NO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED ✻ You do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable. I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first l...
I'm looking for a less than 1-minute 2D animated video that conveys the story of the Gun Campaign. The style should be cartoonish and engaging enough to keep viewers interested. The scenses: - A 12 years old son see his father’s weapon after coming home and puts it in a place where the child knows where it is. - The child plays violent electronic games and uses weapons in the game like pobG - The child has problems and fights with one of his friends while playing with his friends - The child again imagines in flashbacks that he is pressuring a friend with a real gun during an electronic game and using a weapon in the game - The child again had a problem with a friend while playing with his friends. He brought his father&#...
I posted this project a while back, however, we got tied up on another project and several things have changed about the project. First we launched NEW (Stiletto) theme on Shopify plus and for some reason, our SEO is trending down. We spent weeks doing all of the meta tags and the correct characters letters but also know that google changes their requirements about the same time. I am now looking for a FULL-SERVICE agency with a proven track record and understanding of all things shopify and advertising. This includes google ad spend, meta and tik tok? First and foremost, we MUST get our pixel tracking correctly on FB. We have hired multiple freelancers, and somewhere in the code, the pixel is not tracking correctly from FB to Shopify. We cannot spend...
I'm looking for a Shopify expert who can assist in cleaning up and fixing some specific issues with my Shopify coding. I'm experiencing functionality errors which are affecting user experience and also noticed that some URL links are poor which is affecting my Google ads. The ideal candidate should have the following skills: - Proficiency in Shopify coding, particularly in identifying and resolving functionality issues - Experience in addressing URL link problems and their impacts on Google ads - A good understand of web analytics and SEO would be beneficial Key responsibilities include: - Review and clean-up of existing Shopify code - Identify and fix functionality errors - Resolve broken URL links to improve Google ads performance After investigating my land...
...do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable. I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first logic test you complete for me will be an unpaid logic test. In other words, I would not pay you any money whatsoe...
I prefer to have this ready for tommorow afternoon NY time (4PM). Hi, I need an Ad design for a print magazine. Text can be find below Images are in the zipfolder. I ATTACHED A FILE WHERE I MADE A BAD DESIGN JUST SO YOU CAN SEE THE MAIN LAYOUT IDEA FOR THE TOP BUT EACH ELEMENT OF THE BOTTOM NEEDS TO BE DESIGNED NICELY ALONE WITH THE TOP. Each of the elements need to be beautified. An important part of the ad is the section where it says to call a number to order (The real number will be provided to the winner. I will need the source file as well. No images of people should be used in design. Size: "2.5 inches Wide and "10.3 inches tall. TEXT: BUILD A..... Electric S...
I'm seeking a talented French woman singer, who specializes in pop music, for a romantic and gentle project. The lyrics for the song are already in place. This french singer must be able to performing an a cappella rendition of a song approximately 4 minutes long. The lyrics of the song, which will be provided as a reference, should be reproduced as faithfully as possible, if not perfectly, matching the original vocals like a dubbing, adhering to all the notes and pauses. The request for such a service stems from the fact that the original voice exhibits some flaws in articulation. Key requirements: - Proficient in singing in French (accent parisien). - Specializes in pop music. - Comfortable with performing in a romantic and...
My MySQL server is facing issues like high CPU usage and slow queries due to an incorrect configuration. I need a professional who can help me optimize my MySQL server by fixing the file and optimizing all bad queries to reduce the high CPU usage and improve the query speed. Key Responsibilities: - Review and modify the file to optimize the server configuration - Identify and optimize all bad queries to improve query speed - Reduce high CPU usage by fine-tuning the server - Provide a detailed report on the changes made and their impact Access: - You will be provided with AnyDesk access to the server for optimization. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proven experience in MySQL server optimization - Strong knowledge of query optimization technique...
I'm in need of a professional designer to create 16 unique illustrations which will translate into 8 detailed printing labels. These labels will then be used as online design templates for product labeling. All the project description and requirement are state clearly in the project spec pdf document attached here. Please give me completion date and time and your comfortable bidding price for the milestone 1 and milestone 2. I will need to start this immediately. I will be paying each milestone when you are done. There are 2 milestones. Please try and send us sample of milestone 1 and 2 you done in screenshots, so we know you understand the requirement to start. I will be also providing you the 4 design template with 4 design (total ...
My MySQL server is facing issues like high CPU usage and slow queries due to an incorrect configuration. I need a professional who can help me optimize my MySQL server by fixing the file and optimizing all bad queries to reduce the high CPU usage and improve the query speed. Key Responsibilities: - Review and modify the file to optimize the server configuration - Identify and optimize all bad queries to improve query speed - Reduce high CPU usage by fine-tuning the server - Provide a detailed report on the changes made and their impact Access: - You will be provided with AnyDesk access to the server for optimization. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proven experience in MySQL server optimization - Strong knowledge of query optimization technique...
...do not need any experience whatsoever, but you must be clever and eager to learn. No. I am *not* being charitable. I am being practical. ✻ PAYING YOU TO LEARN ✻ No. You aren't dreaming. I value intelligence and problem-solving ability over experience. I'd prefer to work with someone who is clever and learns quickly rather than someone experienced but is not very intelligent and/or does not solve problems scientifically. Would I hire an Isaac Newton or an Albert Einstein even if he had no programming experience? Of course I would. ✻ TESTS ✻ You must pass several difficult logic tests to work with me. The first logic test you complete for me will be an unpaid logic test. In other words, I would not pay you any money whatsoe...
I'm looking for a talented photographer to capture a significant moment in my life - my proposal to my girlfriend at the Oberoi hotel in Marrakesh. Key Requirements: - Filming and taking pictures for approximately 1 hour on May 10th evening - Candid shots of the proposal - Close-up shots of the ring Ideal Skills: - Experienced in event photography, especially proposals - Proficient in capturing candid moments - Able to take high-quality close-up shots This is a one-time event that I intend to remember for the rest of my life, so I'm looking for someone who has the right skills and experience to capture it perfectly.
I have an STL file for a battery box. It consists of a bottom and a top part, that are connected with a simple hinch. On the other side the box is being closed with a latch, see blue circle in image. The problem is that this latch is breaking off because it is not sturdy enough or the tolerances are just too tight so you have to apply too much force to open the box. Please send an STL and ideally a step file that fixes this problem. This is for 3D printing with FDM printer. For an experienced designer this should be quite easy, I think. Looking forward for your offers. Thanks!
We have core PHP web app with some bad quality of code so we plan to rebuild with laravel using better interface and better functionality we will select lower bid thanks
I require a person who has stage combat, choreography, and live performance experience. The main goal is to orchestrate a faux attack scenario wherein I appear to successfully defend myself. Key elements: - Choreographing a believable yet safe confrontation - Ensuring the performance goes as planned in a live setting - Professionalism in order to maintain the illusion for the audience Ideal skills and experience: - Stage combat and choreography - Previous acting or performing arts experience - Ability to react and improvise if things don't go as planned Please note, this is not about encouraging violence or causing fear. It's all about creating an engaging performance that makes me look like a hero in front of my girlfriend...
I'm seeking a creative and experienced professional to create a live action video to explain one of my company's key services to potential customers. The primary goal of this video project is to create an engaging, clear, and distinctive visual depiction of the service that we offer. Ideal freelancer should have: - Proficiency in live action video production Extensive experience is not required. We need someone that can film a project that we will use in a time lapse video and then also recorder some interview style content for social media. 2 days project.
My company is undertaking a project to sell mobile phones to FoodPanda merchants via a 24-month subscription plan. I am using Zoho CRM Contacts module to capture all merchant information, including payments and delivery details. For most of the integrations with other common apps I am using Zoho Flow. As part of the payments, I am using Curlec by Razorpay (Curlec) to collect once off payment (for full upfront for hardware) as well as recurring payments (monthly data connectivity) via direct debit. Curlec obviously is not in the list of supported apps in Zoho Flow but they do have APIs. I want to be able to: 1) Push information to Curlec's direct debit authorization form (so the merchants don't have to key in the details again) suc...
...that I use. I am looking for 10 to 20 haiku to be used in greeting cards. I am producing greeting cards called Brutally True Haiku. Each card will have a humorous haiku that addresses one of those brutal truths that we need to know but don't want to hear. A couple of amateur examples: You are bad at sex Porn is not education Ask me what I like He does not text you Because he does not want to Don't complicate truth I am looking for haiku that are humorous in their simple truth. (They are actually only funny if you are not the receipient). They should not be malicious and they should not be so softened that the brutal truth is obscured. They should not have flowery poetic language. Some possible subjects...
